My wish....

 I’ve never been a real sensitive person. For all of my friends and acquaintances who read that first sentence I can see all of you right now shaking your heads yes. I’m laughing with you too because we all know that it’s true. You also know that I, to a fault, am bluntly honest and for some of you that’s really hard to take. I also find that the older I get the more sensitive to things I become, and I have three little girls to thank for that.  I see the world in which we live in is getting worse and worse by the day, and as a parent that hits a cord with me. 

Earlier this week I was having a horrible time of it. I had just read that ISIS was decapitation woman and children and burying some of them alive. I follow the news here and everywhere and it’s unsettling. They say that a picture says a thousand words. Well the pictures that I saw broke my heart in ways I never thought possible. I couldn’t image being in such a state of turmoil and not being able to do anything about it.  Those poor children experiencing such fear so early in life and their parents watching these horrible men slaughter their neighbors, friends and loved ones.  My heart couldn’t process what I was seeing let alone feeling. I wanted to do what I could for those poor people and unfortunately there wasn’t anything I could do for them sitting half way across the world. How do you stop a terrorist group from slaughtering hundreds of people? Unfortunately, for a person like me, you can’t. It’s unrealistic to think that you could.

On top of the slaughtering and ethnic cleansing going on in Iraq, we have our own little upheaval here in our neck of the woods. We’ve made national and world wide news with the riots that keep getting worse by the day. My sister doesn’t live far from there. I’ve already told her and her family that what little space we do actually have, that they are more than welcome to come and stay with us if the need for it becomes glaringly apparent. My heart hurts for that whole entire community. My heart hurts for the parents who lost their son. My heart hurts for the officer that made the life and death choice that he felt he needed to make. My heart hurts for the people of Ferguson whose community has turned into a circus of violence. My heart hurts for the police officers and their brothers in blue who have promised to protect the people in that community from their own neighbors. I can only pray that we learn the lessons we need to learn from all of this. Sometimes lessons come with a hard price to pay. Regardless, it’s hardly ever an easy answer and still a hard pill to swallow.

Plus, Robin Williams committed suicide. He was in my top five of FUNNIEST men on the planet. It was a hard blow to hear that someone who brought so much joy to others was still fighting so many demons.  I have read a lot of posts on Facebook talking about suicide in general, and one post in particular made me stop.  It was a post about how many service men and woman with PTSD and other post war issues commit suicide every day and why should we grieve so heavily for Robin when he didn’t go to war or give his life in service for our country.  I’m a truth seeker, and very pro soldier, but that made me shake my head again in sadness. Yes, he did not serve in the military. Yes, he did not put his life on the line to protect what a lot of us seem to take for granted EVERYDAY. Did the joy he brought to others affect us in ways we can love and appreciate? The answer to that I hope is yes. We all have talents and special gifts that we give to the world. Some people’s gift is the gift to serve and protect. Some people’s gift is the gift of humor and the ability to bring joy to others. Was his life any less important because he wasn’t a soldier? I hope your answer is to that question is no.  Apples to Apples people; is anyone’s life more important than someone else’s regardless of station or profession? I really hope that you answer no to that. ‘Cause if you answer yes, then Sugar, we need to talk.

 I understand the point they were trying to make, that there are hundreds upon thousands of military personnel that suffer to keep us all safe. I believe the point should be that we need to be aware that people suffer; to be compassionate in our dealings with people in general. We are all judges when it comes to other people’s behavior, but when it comes to our own behavior, we defend ourselves like lawyers! I hope that in taking his own life he brought to light the fact that a lot of people suffer from mental illness. I’ve suffered and fight everyday to not be depressed. Life has given me so many blessings that I wake up in the morning thankful for what I have. It’s just days like the other day with so much sadness in the world that my depression creeps back in and I have to step back and look at it objectively. I have to separate the things I CAN do from the things that are outside of my control. I want to fix it all, but that is unrealistic. I have to not feel bad for the things that I can’t control and let those things go and pray that God watches over those people.

My wish is that people go out every day and make a difference in other people’s lives. Say something nice to someone, compliment someone, help someone if you can for Christ SAKE’s it’s FREE! This kind of behavior creates such a positive ripple in the world. I choose to start everyday with a thankful and grateful heart. Compliment people, encourage good positive behavior, to create an environment that is ripe for “Rockin’ on with your bad self!”  THESE are the traits that I want to be remembered for and to raise my girls to emulate. I want to be remembered for lifting up the down trodden, for giving confidence to the under dogs, for helping people understand that you don’t have to be a real sensitive person to be a sincere one. You can still tell the truth and not be so harsh about it. Being a kind person isn’t so hard; you just have to “wanna” do it. So in our times of trouble and sadness, I know I can’t change the past or affect changes around the world, but what I CAN do is be good to others. Change can start with me and I can assure you it does and will continue till the day I pass.

Be the change you wish to see in the world. -  Mahatma Gandhi

My jar full of wishes